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Acceptance

by SLNCR

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1.
Worthless 02:20
(audio of Aeric Walton talking about his upbringing) I don't matter Just cast my vote aside It's so hard to keep breathing, and harder to stay alive. And to the world outside; if I died tomorrow the world wouldn't blink an eye. It's been a long time, I've got a lot on my chest. No feelings of remorse- I just coat it with selfishness. I didn't ask for life. If I died tomorrow, the world wouldn't blink an eye.
2.
Persevere 03:54
My heart is riddled with disgust for the way I treated you, for the way we fell apart. It takes a real man to admit he's wrong. For the weight of my failures I will carry on with you. I just hope you find forgiveness in your heart to see you passed your current misfortunes If I could turn back time and see myself through your eyes; I wouldn't force you to be here. No, I played this in my mind sometime before. I've hurt the ones closest to me. And I can't keep bringing you down, you say my name then chew my out. So just go. I promise you'll be better off alone. My heart is riddled with disgust that you would let this train keep moving, even though we fell apart. Why won't you admit that you're in the wrong. For the weight of your failures you will carry on without me. If I could turn back time and see myself through your eyes; I wouldn't force you to be here. No, I played this in my mind sometime before. I've hurt the ones closest to me. And I can't keep bringing you down, you say my name then chew my out. So just go. I promise you'll be better off alone. I will carry on with only memories. Carry on with all of my hatred.
3.
Contrast 03:02
In a struggle of "perfection" we lost sight of what's in front of us, and bred a culture of regression trying harder to regain the trust that we had in ourselves and others we held close, but what is left when we're in the dirt? In trying to make a difference we became what we swore we'd never be. If I die before this happens I hope you all carry on where we left off. I press my hands into the soil and write "Those that are here when I'm gone, I am so sorry for the way things left off. This is my message to a dying world. Remember that we are all tied together in this world by a single thread of life with forces that we deem unknown. If they see you different, or they use their hate to bring you down just pick yourself up, and let these words ring loud; be the change that you want to see in this world." (audio from Good Will Hunting - "you're just a kid")
4.
Relentless 03:43
(audio from Good Will Hunting - "you're just a kid") Looking down upon me, can you see this broken man trying to find a meaning in life , and see the bigger plan. I had an expectance to follow in your footsteps, but the sun has set on this season and I'm still waiting for answers. These demons call out to me. They drag me down and force me to believe. There has to be more to life than this. Oh god I wish for all of this to end. I don't feel like myself anymore. Now watch me fade. I raise my head up towards the sky, waiting to see your light while I'm trapped in the darkness. All I wanted was your voice, but all I have is emptiness. So much for relentless love. Stare into my eyes and tell me what you see; an empty shell of a man, haunted by memories. I'm sinking down like an anchor in the sea pulling myself away from everyone that cares about me. For an all-seeing being, you left me without any kind of feeling. What was right, just feels wrong. Can't seem to find a meaning. I don't feel like myself anymore. Now watch me fade. I looked towards you. I raise my head up towards the sky, waiting to see your light while I'm trapped in the darkness. All I wanted was your voice, but all I have is emptiness. So much for relentless love. I can't escape this emptiness. There has to be more to life than this. There has to be more to this...
5.
How could you end up with everything? How could I end up with nothing? There's selfishness built in your ways. We were both there from the start. We planned on sharing our best years together, but then you turned your back, and started running your mouth. Your actions are what changed us forever. It pains me to think how we could've been. I'm left here sinking down in my own misery (alone). I need guidance. I need direction. Your worthless heart will wither and die alone. It pains me to think how we could've been. I'm left here sinking down in my own misery (alone). Thank you for proving you never wanted this. Your worthless heart will wither and die alone. There's selfishness built in your ways. And every time someone speaks your name I'm going to set them straight. You are the coward that jumped ship before this started sailing. Making me believe, every time, that my talented was being wasted. I'm in disbelief that I could ever let you get so close to me. I will make the difference alone and without you. You're burning bridges just to light your own path. You're looking back at what I built up from the ash. You'll never gain the respect you've stained. There's selfishness built in your ways. It pains me to think how we could've been. I'm left here sinking down in my own misery (alone). I need guidance. I need direction. Your worthless heart will wither and die alone. It pains me to think how we could've been. I'm left here sinking down in my own misery (alone). Thank you for proving you never wanted this. Your worthless heart will wither and die alone. I will make the difference alone and without you.
6.
Anguish 03:38
Aren't you sick and tired of starting over, and over again? Going through the motions in life, seeking those you can't depend on. I once had a home, I could call my own. But now all that's left is anguish and loneliness. Blinded by my rage. Consumed by hatred; I pushed your love away. I did this to myself and I'll never be the same. Why can't this pain just go away. Set me on fire so I can feel your warmth again. I am so tired of running on empty. I never knew that things could end so easily. They say things that come so easy will fall apart just as quick. It was an uphill battle, but I still will wish you the very best. You were forged in fire, and my heart was black and cold. And I was always destined to be unloved. I give into my anguish and accept the things that I can't change. Set me on fire so I can feel your warmth again. I am so tired of running on empty. I never knew that things could end so easily. Set me on fire so I can feel your warmth again. I give into my anguish and accept the things that I can't change.
7.
Acceptance 03:52
(audio from the "Charles Manson - Dianna Sawyer documentary") It only happens in the morning light; the sadness creeps into my head. What a world we try to be in, but I never wanted life to begin with. I wash my hands of all the pain and guilt that I’ve felt over these past few years. It hasn’t been much easier to move on and forget. My life was taken, while my heart was buried in silence, but I never wanted life to begin with. You could’ve left without saying a word and it wouldn’t have hurt any less. I felt the ground, from beneath my feet, give way from underneath me. You tore me apart and right where my heart used to be you took all of these memories of a life I once had completely vanished. I wash my hands of this. This is my acceptance.

credits

released July 4, 2018

Album art by Ahren of Designs By Shifted
Cowriting by Matt Argyelan, and Josh Billimoria
Engineered, mixed, mastered, produced and writing by
Arrold Walton at Clearskies Recording Studio.

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